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​Overcoming "Thriver Guilt"

11/4/2024

 
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It is interesting to see oneself, not only as a survivor, but a thriver.  My parents, sister, and other relatives have had very difficult challenges, and some have died at fairly early ages.

I have been blessed with many opportunities, challenges, and supportive people (angels).  These include an education with major contributors in psychology and sociology.

I have been involved in the Men's Liberation movement for over sixty years, and met incredibly gifted leaders such as Abraham Maslow, Robert Bly, and Michael Gurian.  

I have been invited to meet with Presidents and Vice-Presidents at the White House several times regarding school shooting and fatherhood issues.

My parents did not have such opportunities.  My father was a poor immigrant, coming to the United States in 1920 at age 16.  He traveled on a ship, not knowing anyone.  My mother, a gifted writer, was not permitted to go to college because she was female.

My sister, a dedicated teacher, passed away in her early fifties from cancer.

At 83, I realize they all affected me, and are part of me.  But, it is sometimes hard to accept all the good that has come my way.  I don't know if there is such a thing as "thriver guilt," but I put it out there to be explored.

My mother always lived in gratitude.  "There, but for the Grace of God, go I," she said many, many times when she witness someone suffering with poverty or health issues.

My parents were poultry farmers in New Jersey, and we were economically poor.  Both my parents were gifted, and helped many people in need. They struggled, working several jobs, but were generous and kind.

So, I must realize that they thrived in their own ways, and did their part for make a more loving world.

Thriver guilt can turn into love and appreciation of every blessing in life.  We are all gifted with love, and blessed with grace.  Let us use our gifts to cherish life, spirit, the earth and each other.
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Mike Obsatz | Troy Carstensen
Minneapolis, MN